Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
