I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
My liver just had a heart attack.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize