Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
