i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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