just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
