As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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