if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Randomize