I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
