I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
