Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
