why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
