physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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