Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize