Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
