am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
