That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
