life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
