Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize