my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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