whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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