you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
