Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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