last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
