Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
she peed on how many people?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
