Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
We need to rekindle our bromance
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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