she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
