Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Randomize
