she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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