Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
