when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
She announced her abortion via fbk
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize