I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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