Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
