I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
