Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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