Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
