First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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