At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
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