is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Hippo gnu deer
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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