I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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