There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
