My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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