I can tuck mytits in my pants
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
