um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize