Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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