I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize