do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
