hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
