beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
