Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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