Will you blow on my dice?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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